Womanhood


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Keeping your nose to the grindstone will only get you so far. You’ll never advance if you can’t socialize. Start small, then learn to work the crowd, today.

Even my horoscope is yelling at me. Slow the freak D. O. W. N.

I’m trying. I’m trying. I’m trying.

I am grateful for the boyfriend, who by being in my life, is keeping me from becoming a complete hermit crab. I never thought that I would be the kind of person who wanted to have a set-in-stone, weekly-date-night. But I do. I am really appreciating it right now. Even though not all of our dates are full of romance and passion, with fairy-tale kisses and firework-displays; they are perfectly suited to where I am right now, and what I need.

Last night was the perfect example of this. I had nothing planned, other than him coming over, and cooking a meal, maybe watching some of the TV show that he is introducing me too. He shared with me that he wanted to go out with this group of friends, for pizza. A group that he is slowing getting to know and enjoy their company, and I as well. They are all nice people, and of like-minds; so its nice to get to just be ourselves with them. It was a low-key, outing, where we got to see each other face-to-face, and hold hands, and talk about our days. All the while, sharing some food and good company with nice people.

So, to the Universe – I’m working on it. And Zack is helping. 🙂

Very well actually. (*shocked*)  Even when I’m not trying to grow stuff.

I had planted some eggplant seeds, back when I planted all of the other seeds. Back when the peas, the beans, the squashes, the tomatoes, the cucumbers and broccoli, collards, celery, and lettuce all came up; the eggplants barely showed their sweet faces.  The few little seedlings that came up, I gave half of, to my Momma.  Her’s grew, tall and strong.  I even was blessed with some of her crop.  I enjoyed those 2 yummy fruits.  My plants hid under their neighbors.

She told me how she tended to her’s.  She thought that if I did the same things, then my plants would flourish.  She was trying to get more from her plants, but they had other plans. She gave them back to the earth a few weeks ago. I took time to pull out the dead plants, in my planter, as well.  Giving gratitude for the lessons, that I am capable of growing plants.

I found 2 wee eggplants, still shyly hiding in the undergrowth.  Along with a brand new  squash, that had decided to sprout up, from a previous fruit, I had not harvested. I told them that, they could stay as they wanted.  I didn’t expect them to grow.

I was wrong.

They Grew!!!!

They Grew!!!!

They grew big and full of leaves.  Momma told me that if I snipped off bits, here and there, that I could get some fruit from them.  I just left them alone.  I have never been very good at tending to the garden.  Then 1 day it gave me a beautiful sight.

Flowers!!!

Flowers!!!

Dozens of pretty lavender colored flowers.  I have been enjoying their beauty for a couple of weeks now.  Last week I saw this.

Eggplants!!!

Eggplants!!!

Yes.

Yes. I am the proud mommy of a dozen baby eggplants. They are so cute.  So happy looking there, on the plant.  Soooooooooooooo Purple. 🙂

Happy Eggplant.

Happy Eggplant.

I’m soaking up their happiness.

My pretty foot.

My pretty foot.

All the way around to my ankle.

All the way around to my ankle.

These were done by Daphne.

Yep. They were among her first attempts at even doing any sort of henna tattooing.

This all came about because of my sweet sister.

At the beginning of our Sisters Retreat Weekend, we are asked to stand up and announce to the Circle who we are, and what we bring to the community. Some women respond with, I’m a massage therapist. Others say, I’m really good at listening. I spoke of my own truths and talents. Daphne’s response was: I’m Daphne, and I’m not good at anything. I don’t have any talents.
😦

My sisters strove to change her mind on that. And Saturday morning one sister asked Daphne to put a mandala on her belly. She, like many of us, know about Daphne’s talent for free-handed drawings of mandalas. She brought some henna and told Daphne to decorate. So she did. After all, even Daphne knows not to speak back to one of her aunts. LoL

Beautiful henna - made even more so by the little boy inside.

Beautiful henna – made even more so by the little boy inside.

I am so grateful to her, and the others, who encouraged my child. To the ones who complimented her talents. To her for decorating my own foot and ankle. I feel so ubber pretty with my decorations. The only direction I gave her was to start at my big toe, and end around my ankle area. I think that she did an amazing job. I am looking forward to more of her talents being displayed upon my body.

At the end of the weekend, we are asked to give our thoughts on our experiences. Daphne said, “I’m grateful that I now know what my talent is.”

((*BIG MOMMA SIGH*))

Good morning Slimey!

Good morning Slimey!

Yes this is what I just found, creeping across the arm of my Grandfather’s chair. The chair that I have placed in my office, for sitting in and relaxing, as I look over pages, read up on new stuff, and plan out my day, week, month.

Obviously I have been “Doing” too much and not “Being” enough. Hence this slimey, creepy-crawler, who is very very slow at moving off of my chair – and doesn’t seem to have any plans for picking up the pace, any time soon – slithered into my path this morning.

He is not the first person to notice this, and bring it up to me. I am getting brow-beaten by my Sweetie into going to bed earlier. It turns out that I am not 19 years old any more, and cannot function in a beauteous way, when I stay up past midnight. Again and again and again and again – for nearly 2 weeks now. (*Please note: Last night I did make it to bed by 10pm – and slept until 7! I clearly needed the rest.*)

I also look back on my Sister’s Healing Weekend Retreat and the ways that Spirit was talking to me, through my Sister’s stories. I see a sweet sister working herself to death. She is suffering physical bodily problems that are directly related to burning the candle at both ends. I watched as another sister, who is Western medically trained, listen to her chest, for signs of heart-attack. I don’t want to work myself into a state where I feel a vise-grip around my chest. I know that she doesn’t either. She is looking into ways to find more balance in her life, between her work, that she loves to do and is very good at – and her home life which is suffering, along side of her body. I can take a lesson from her experiences.

But first: I am going to gently thank Mr. Slimey for the reminder, and carefully put him back outside in the yard – where he belongs. Message received. In gratitude.

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pedestal

So first off – they are lonely places. High up, away from the rest of the world, they are colder usually than down on the ground. There’s never enough room to fit more than one (1) person, so it gets sorta lonely up there. Its boring too. Nothing to do but really sit there, and try not to fall off.

The second part is that they hurt when you do fall off. And you’re gonna fall off. Eventually everyone falls off the pedestal that they’ve been put on. You can’t stay up there forever. Something is bound to happen that throws off the balance that you are keeping, in trying to stay up there on the damn thing. Oppsy-Daisy, we all fall down. When falling down off of the pedestal, not only do you get hurt – but generally you manage to smack into the person who put you up there to begin with.

I got smacked in the head this morning. And it hurt.

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